Pooplosion

There has been so much that has happened since the last time I blogged (sorry about that!) that its hard to even begin to update you all on everything, so I’ll update you later. No, really… I have to tell you what happened earlier tonight. I call this event ‘Pooplosion’.

The babies have become very fond of their walkers, in fact they are more like runners here with the wood floors. Nothing gets in their way, these kids are talented, in fact they could turn on a dime they are so good with their walkers (well maybe more like a salad plate (not dinner plate, they’re better than a dinner plate)). When the babies are in their runners they are determined to be in whatever room I am in (including the bathroom which is slightly creepy when you’re trying to pee and you have two sets of eyes looking at you. Note to self, close the bathroom door when you’re “home alone”.) so I constantly have a baby shadow following me (another note to self, shin guards would be a good investment).

Tonight was no different; baby shadow was in full effect post dinner time. I was sitting on the couch, while Sean was lounging on the rug in front of the couch when I look to my right and there is Liam happy as a lark in his runner with Abram directly beside him (more like ramming Liam to push him out of the way) when I notice an interesting streak on the floor. Sean sees me looking at the ever interesting anomaly on the floor and proceeds to ask me what ‘it’ is, to which I respond “I think it’s a poop streak!”. Immediately I pull Liam out of his runner and do the sniff check…yup…poop. It wasn’t until I was going to set him on the floor to check the runner for poop when I noticed a giant lump of “real people poop” lodged to the side of his leg (when babies start having real poop it’s weird. If you haven’t experienced the transition from slime to nugget, just trust me when I say it is weird.). Apparently sitting in the runner doesn’t allow room for poop to go in its designated diaper locale and thus it gets pushed out the side, and some lucky bits end up on the floor. Hooray me!

Immediately I take a squirming Liam, holding him as if he were to touch my body I’d turn to poop too, and head for the changing table. The nice thing about “real people poop” is it cleans off of a baby fairly easy. Sean grabs a wipe a heads in the direction of the poop streak when I notice I have poop on the top of my foot. How the heck poop ended up there I have no clue, but I’ve been covered in poop before so this was no biggie. I intercept the wipe from Sean and bend down to clean the top of my foot off when I notice a poop spot on the floor leading into the nursery…so using the same wipe I clean that up. A foot beyond that, another poop spot… And a foot beyond that, another. At this point I am flipping out because apparently a poop monster has invaded my house and didn’t bother to take his damn shoes off first!

Upon further investigation I discovered that the pooplosion must have happened some time prior to my realizing the giant wad-o-poo stuck to Liam’s leg because…wait for it…wait for it…there were racetracks of poop all over! Apparently Liam pooped, and Abram was like “oh hey, Liam pooped and now he has better lubrication on his wheels so I’m going to roll through the poop and lube mine up too!”. I’ll tell ya, twin competition is dirty business. Needless to say, I ditched the wipe and Sean pulled out the big guns…the Swiffer.

Baby poop racetrack – 0
Swiffer – 1

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