What do you get when you put an architect and an interior designer together in Venice…? Two people who have never said “oh wow”, “oh my…”, and “Liam lost his pacifier again” so much in their lives. Okay, so the latter statement wasn’t in direct correlation with the stunning architecture but I’m pretty sure he dropped it only because his jaw dropped, along with ours, walking through the ancient city. Abram probably would have too if he valued a pacifier as much as Liam does. He did however appreciate the wonderful acoustics in all of the churches we visited, wow can that kid belt out a tune in the most inconvenient location!
The first day doesn’t fully count in my book. It was spent mostly in transit, but we did manage to see the Rialto Bridge, and Saint Marks Square before calling it a night and attempting to find some place to eat. The Italian eating schedule was one battle we had to overcome with the babies. Not eating until 7:30-8:00 at night will wreak havoc on a kiddos’ schedule, especially if their typical bedtime is 8:00pm… I have to admit, as kid friendly the people may be (everywhere we went we heard “aaaa bambino!” and were attacked by old Italian grandmas) the city itself is not kid friendly. Not one single restaurant had high chairs, except for the American chain restaurant, the Hard Rock Café. Sean and I about jumped for joy when they said they did indeed have high chairs, and I think Abram appreciated it too…
Over the following three days we had managed to walk what seemed like a hundred miles with babies strapped to our chests and by the end of those three days my shoulders wanted to detach themselves and go yelping off into the Venetian sunset. Honestly though, with all the bridges we crossed, a stroller would have only slowed us down, and slowing down was not an option. Even with seeing all the main architecture sites Venice has to offer, a Grand Canal tour, and an island hopping excursion to three nearby islands. We didn’t see enough… I’m not even positive a week’s worth of touring Venice would be enough. It was hands down my most favorite place I have ever been and would gladly go back.
Murano is known for its beautiful (and expensive!) glass, particularly the chandeliers. We watched how the glass was handmade, which was very impressive, but damn was it hot! You could feel the ovens blazing, and being packed in like sardines didn’t help with the temperature comfort level.
Torcello is not known for much but I’ll never forget it that tiny island. Why you ask? For the pure bliss that came over me when I saw that there was a water closet available, and then the fear of waking a sleeping Abram. See…when you have a sleeping baby strapped to you the process of using the restroom becomes a feat of skill involving balance, grace, and sheer luck. Here I am, having a staring contest with the toilet wondering if I should hold ‘it’ or attempt ‘it’ in hopes of not waking the tiny slobbery beast attached to me…I totally went for it. Imagine a ballet consisting of 1.25 people with the most perfect plié over the toilet. The dance ‘Sleep Slobbery Beast’ was pulled off brilliantly until I flushed the toilet. That thing had the suction of 1000 Dyson vacuums in perfect sync. I so badly wanted to tell it “Screw you ferocious toilet! Screw you and the poop tube you rode in on!”, but held my tongue in hopes of not scarring the bejebus (oh how I love that made up word…) out of my fellow stall neighbors.
The last island we visited was Burano which is known for its lace, colorful buildings, and cookies. Oh were those cookies good, and the babies thought they were fabulous too!
Want to know what else was fabulous about Venice? In the peace and quiet of our hotel bathroom, I was able to watch the birth of Seamonkey (that’s the nickname I gave my niece from the first day my sister sent me a text message photo of her positive pee stick) thanks to FaceTime. With the help of a stand, I was placed in such a way that I could help cheer my sister on by telling her to scream her best “fauck” (my version of the ‘F’ word with a German accent) she could, and watch as the Dr. Big Hands placed her in my sister’s arms for the first time. I’ll never forget it, nor do I think her nurse will either. That woman was giving me all sorts of stank-face-esque looks… Oh, and here’s a pointer for those who are going to watch a birth live from the comfort of their hotel bathroom…make sure that once the baby is out, have someone move the device you’re watching from on their end. Why? Because seeing a placenta pulled out is not pleasant (unless you’re in the medical field or completely sick in the head). Anyway, Seamonkey is here and doing well…and I love her to pieces (Where did that saying come from? Am I the only one that thinks it’s slightly odd?), plus she and I now share a middle name, which makes her officially pretty damn cool.
I would write more, but I think the pictures speak louder than I do, figuratively speaking.